A girl and her dog

Pax has been my constant companion for the past 5 years and 6 months. I remember the day I picked him out with Terry, Mary, Candice and Michael. We all went to Middleton and hung out in Roy's barn watching the baby collies that late winter. Roy showed us how the collies can herd sheep and jump fences and do tricks. They were splendid dogs. We met his mom and dad and said yes okay what about him - we will take the one with the broken white collar. I don't think his eyes were even open.  We returned April 17th, 2012 to pick him up. Me driving home, Terry holding him in a basket.

We were branching out for another go with a canine companion. About a year previous we had put our shepherd down because his hips had gone and he could not walk much anymore. It broke my heart, I still see him being put into the car to go to the vet. I remember how much I cried afterward, how we all did, how lonely it was to run in the woods without him by my side. I never thought I would be ready again for another to take his place. But as life happens, life happened. A co worker needed her husky exercised and I offered to take him when I ran. That dog jumped out of his skin when he saw me coming, he was a sweetie and it was good to have a running buddy again. Even if it made me cry over missing my Rembrandt.  And this husky wore me down, made me want that connection with a dog again. So I knew it was time to bring one into my life.

Pax is a special dog, no really he is. He is gentle beyond (you can put your hand with food right into his mouth and he won't bite down on it only the food). He loves to cuddle on the bed, on your lap, in your chair with you, on the floor you name it he wants to cuddle. He knows my emotions- when I am sad he comes and lays his head on my lap and looks at me with his beautiful and somewhat sad brown eyes. When I am upset or angry he sulks off anxiously into the den to lay in the corner (yes he is a tad anxious poor soul). If he could say I love you mommy he would.  It is this moment in the hall of the apartment on the way outside, this thing I noticed he does. He does not pull on the lease, he holds back and stays right by my left side and looks up at me as we walk toward the door his head and body really close to my side, just looking at me. He has done it numerous times, it's one of those moments, a connection between a girl and her dog that just will forever resonate in my heart. I always look to see if he will do it, most times he does not  but sometimes I get lucky. I love you too Pax, I would do anything for you.

In the past Pax was Terry's dog. He was the one who played frisbee and ball with him everyday in and outside of the house. I was the one who took him for runs in the woods but Terry fed him and played with him. I remember Terry saying he was afraid he wouldn't see Pax again when he was in the ER sick. He loved that dog too. Pax loved him, but would not stay on his sick bed. Pax got more anxious after Terry died. Pax loved Terry too obviously.  But he has me now, and I try hard to make him miss that master less and love this mistress more. He and I both together on this journey.

Pax met lots of people this weekend, he loved them all, he is fickle that way- going into someone elses bed for a cuddle without a second thought of me! Hah! I love it though, his open heart. I love bringing him to his second home, the cottage makes him very happy so I tried to ensure he got there almost every weekend this summer. I love this picture my friend took of him on my deck this past weekend. He looks like a puppy all fuzzy and back lit with the sun.

Hey Pax you and I are companions, you are my constant. I loves you to pieces, I know both you and I can have other companions, find others to give our hearts to, but please continue to walk by my side and look me in the eyes on our walks out the apartment door.